“I don't know if kicking it down is a good idea: might result in an angrier Patrick. What about the others? Any of them know how to pick a lock?”

Hrm. Yeah.

Um, Joe might.

“It's times like these when I wish I could teleport without dying once I get to where I'm going... In any case, please tell me that somewhere in your wonderfully wild past, you learned how to pick locks?”

I can’t pick locks, but I’m pretty sure I can kick down the door if he doesn’t come out soon.

“Spencer and Brendon are still alive?! Thank the gods! XP He was just talking to me a while ago, and I know that he's a little stressed. If he still won't come out in a couple of hours, and he's still conscious, I'd suggest you go in there and ask him what's wrong.”

Haha, yeah, they’re still alive. Or wait. I mean, undead.

I think Trick is more than a little stressed, lily. He’s never not let Spencer in before. Or locked the door.

“Pete, did you ever consider it was the cold turkey that was the problem? Vampires and their "donors" usually build a bond like this, and it's nigh impossible to break, and if it gets down to the point where it is breaking, it causes pain so immense that there have been people who have died from it. With the right diet, and if doing this could help him to sleep, Patrick wouldn't wither at all: he'd actually get stronger.”

Making him go cold turkey was my fault too. I’m so stupid, so, so, stupid.

But maybe…maybe you’re right.

I’ll talk to him about it when he comes out of his room. He hasn’t left it for a few hours now.

He wouldn’t even let Spencer in.

“What about Patrick? If he'd donate a safe amount of blood, then he won't get the craving to be bitten like he did, and you'd have insanely fresh blood bagged and ready to go. Andy and Joe could probably do it, too, if they'd agree to it. All you need is someone to show Patrick how to tap a vein and set up a collection apparatus. What have you two been talking about?”

It’s not that simple; he’d still get the craving. He went from being bitten a few times a week to cold turkey. Trick’s told me it’s like a constant buzz or itch at the back of his brain. how does he even sleep at night?oh wait, he doesn’t.

And I don’t want him too anyway. He needs his strength, being drained every few days would wear him down even more, even if Andy and Joe helped out. There are three vampires now in HQ, it’s not just me any more.

I don’t want to watch him wither away any more than I have too, lily. It’s hard enough being in the same room with him sometimes.

We’ve been trying to get ourselves sorted out. Like…where our relationship stands right now.

“I won't tell Patrick if you don't freak that I've been talking to Ryan a lot lately, and he's told me that there's a possibility that you could drink bagged blood if it's fresh enough. Also, have you tried animal blood? I know it sounds horrible, but if it could work, why not? I still think that you and Patrick need to have some communication and honesty going here, though, Pete. But I'll keep your secret.”

I still don’t trust Ross, but I know Trick does, so I leave him alone. Hrm. We tried that, but it’s hard to get blood that is fresh enough, it becomes posion to us really fast once it’s outside of the body.

We haven’t tried animal blood though. But I’ll give it a shot.

Me and him have been talking, lily, I promise.

just not about this, he doesn’t need anything else weighing down on his shoulders.

“*hands on hips* Peter, if you don't talk about what's wrong, you may never find a way to make it right. You can trust me, you know.”

*sighs* Alright, alright, lily.

But you can not let Trick find out, do you hear me?

The formula isn’t doing what it’s supposed to do. I’m starving and I’m sure Brendon and Spencer are too. But I can’t tell Trick that, I just can’t.

He already has enough shit eating him up from the inside.

“How could Patrick possibly have resisted a lovable son of a bitch like you?! It doesn't seem right!”

Haha, thanks, but it kinda makes sense, you know? I am a few years older then Trick. And it took him a long time to get used to the stupid, crazy shit that I used to do.

“Oh, no! What's got you feeling so terrible?!”

I don’t know yesIdoIknowexactlywhat’swrong, maybe I just need some sunlight *laughs weakly*

“You said once that you would exterminate all vampires, including yourself. With Brendon and Spencer there and good, does that change your mind a little bit?”

I’ll have to get back to you on that.

I honestly don’t know right now.

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